It's Been Forever And A Day

I inch closer to moving, and it is a place I can't wait to go to. This town has oppressed me for far too long. There is so much that I am willing to leave behind to get a new start. The only thing I don't want to leave is my band here in Phoenix. Funny part about that, they might wind up, well at least 3/4 of the group to Flag by next year. Weird.

This past four weeks has been one hell of a ride. I have felt literally all emotions that I thought I could feel. Right now it is sheer joy, but me a few weeks ago would not have thought that. It has been interesting to say the least. It will make for some very interesting lyrics when we start writing again.

Well, I guess I'll start at the band. This story was very interesting. First off, there were never any glaring visible problems that anyone talked about. Things were fine. Until one night, but no one guessed anything was wrong. Yeah, things may have gone haywire, but that was a personal matter, which I will get to later. I knew something wasn't right on stage. It during the set I kept on being interrupted on stage by Kurtis. We have always done for the most part I lead conversation on stage, and they would butt in when appropriated. I wasn't able to say what I had been saying in show about the songs, which I know people like to hear, he even said at one point, unbeknownst to me about someone "he's fun to drink with." We don't drink, well I don't, and now I know for a fact the band is straight-edge with all members. Then the next day I was being asked to leave the band I formed with my brother, and my brother stuck up for me because what was going on was horribly wrong. So since we were the founding members we were keeping the name, and since for the most part my brother was the main writer, we were keeping the music. Now out of all of this I was called a dictator, and such. Which I found out later that I was far from that. Apparently the second drummer we had was kicked out by Kurtis, and no one in the band had any say, or heard anything of it. So there was the whole mess of that, there is more like how we wanted to be the front man and such. It was a mess. I don't know the entire story because I was left in the dark about this, and just going on what I heard.

Now here is the band now of days, funny I kind of consider this the original line-up. When my brother and I started formulating this we had originally wanted to get Christian on the drums, and Wes on the guitar or bass. So You could say this was meant to be. I honestly like this line-up a whole lot better. I don't think I have ever laughed so hard in a band, and had so much fun playing the music. Now I am playing rhythm guitar, and singing. Such an energy release.

Lets tap on another topic, because this I believe is a stem of all of these problems that arose over the last few weeks, my old band mates. Let me say this about them, they are liars, and losers. It was a year ago that I left that band for that reason. Never have I met a group of people sputtering in place and think they are going somewhere. I get them their first show outside of a little venue, and not once to I receive a thanks or anything. It's just funny, even though I am not tied to that band, and I am still getting them gigs because they are so inept to getting their own. They try to act all "tough" and like "bad-ass," and then when they are presented with a chance to act like a tough guy, or a bad-ass in a fight, they back down, and call security because they are too weak to fight, or too afraid. To you sir, you are a fucking coward. They are just bad people. I honestly wish only the worst for them.

Then last but not least, we have the now ex-girlfriend. Sometimes I wish I never called your friend, but we can't change the past no can we. We all make statements about how we hate the past, and never want to relive it, which seems to be a theme on this blog, but of course she had to follow her tracks to the hole she was in. It is kind of comical. For someone to all themselves classy, you actually have to be "class." I don't think smoking and drinking qualify as "classy." I know one girl that I actually can call a "classy woman," but you are not one. Sadly enough by the end I was kind of getting disgusted by you. I guess I should have listened to my gut instincts from the start. Whatever. I did care for you, I did like you, but it wasn't going any further than that. So that's why I am so okay with it. I was over it before it even ended, but I know you were cheating on me. I know it, so you don't have to try and deny it. Just adding against your cause for not being classy. I gave you a lot of things, I was chivalrous, and took you places. You did a lot for me, at times and I think you. When you are a backstabber, you deserve nothing. So when you ship is sinking in the future, I will be sailing different seas, and will only deliver a short eulogy at your shipwreck.

I never understood the Pennywise song "Bro-Hymn" until recently, and now I get it. If you read the lyrics that is exactly how I feel with the people around me currently. I really have a lack of trust for people, I don't know how long that will take to heal, but it will. All that will remain are scars from the days gone by. The scars that we bare is what makes us. From the fights we have lost, and the fights we have won. That is what truly shapes us. We give up, we are nothing, we stand up to something we will only get stronger. I know that my old band mates in their "new" band (more like re-hashes of songs I help write,) and ex are quitters. They will give in to anything.

This may be a month late, but I feel this is the right time to say all this. Think what you must, and take from it whatever you want. I know the people I am calling out may be reading this, these are only words. You had your chance to confront me, and you backed down. Some day these people will wake up and see the disaster that is their life... Yeah right.

Oh, and speaking of seas, and analogies. I am already on a different sea. I braved the storm, and took it head on. From here it is relatively clear sailing. There will be rough seas again, but I am ready for anything.

For David..

I know it's been a month since I last posted. These are the lyrics I have, and I figured I'd let David learn them for the show, and anyone else who wants to read. There's the set songs, and the few we haven't played yet.

Enjoy..

1. "Built To Fail"

Something that I see every day
So fucked up I can't say
Those unforgiving faces are everywhere
Alert, but not aware
As the surroundings start to close in
Some where we've all been

Whoa-oh-oh oh--
We're built to fail, every time we slip and fall
Whoa-oh-oh oh--
You can't curtail, through it all we're standing tall

There's nothing for us here
A shell is what remains
All these vices have become amplified
Still can't break through the chains
As the surroundings start to close in
Some where we've all been


Whoa-oh-oh oh--
We're built to fail, cause every time we slip and fall
Whoa-oh-oh oh--
You can't curtail, through it all we're still standing tall
Whoa-oh-oh oh--
We're built to fail, cause every time we slip and fall
Whoa-oh-oh oh--
You can't curtail, through it all we're still standing tall

-solo-

Whoa-oh-oh oh--
We're built to fail, cause every time we slip and fall
Whoa-oh-oh oh--
You can't curtail, through it all we're still standing tall
Whoa-oh-oh oh--
We're built to fail, cause every time we slip and fall
Whoa-oh-oh oh--
You can't curtail, through it all we're still standing tall

2 "Third Wheel"

It's the place we go, After the lights go out
A cruel nightmare, that no one talks about
To all the broken dreams, that have become your life
It's like searching for an answer, And living on a knife

Unfair letdown,
Reset your dreams

This house you made can't be a home
The innocents we trust, is left all alone (whoa--)
Your heart is with us, though your not here
These words wont reach you, but we'll always be near

The ones you love, can't be trusted
When simplicity is gone, so much for being adjusted
They're breaking down doors, and the scars won't heal
And your parents love, make you feel like the third wheel

Unfair letdown,
Reset your dreams

This house you made can't be a home
The innocents we trust, is left all alone (whoa--)
Your heart is with us, though your not here
These words wont reach you, but we'll always be near

{solo}

This house you made can't be a home
The innocents we trust, is left all alone (whoa--)
Your heart is with us, though your not here
These words wont reach you, but we'll always be near

3. "Turbulence (Amerikan Nightmare)"

To the empty streets, with boarded up windows
Broken dreams that once lived here
Better times that we stop and try to remember
As those memories don't seem too clear
The shouts under a unrelenting sun go un heard
But the mindless still adhere

We don't know what to say
It was going to happen anyway

The American dream, has become a nightmare (whoa--)
Unconscious, and unaware
The promised land is now a waste land (whoa--)
Stuck in the nine to five command

Don't blink, and have no fear this is not a test
Everyone has fucked you over
What you are feeling is called being opressed
Or just your just middle class
We are getting thirsty, and becoming unaddressed
The empty streets are rising

We don't know what to say
It was going to happen anyway

The American dream, has become a nightmare (whoa--)
Unconscious, and unaware
The promised land is now a waste land (whoa--)
Stuck in the nine to five command

The American dream, has become a nightmare (whoa--)
Unconscious, and unaware
The promised land is now a waste land (whoa--)
Stuck in the nine to five command

4. "On Edge"

"On Edge"
All along we'll sit by the fire
While the rest sit and conspire
Behind the scenes, forgetting you and me
Creating the lies that we see

Getting lost, trying to remember
Things haven't been right since September
Just fighting the air that we breathe
It always comes around, it always come around

I'm still hoping for better days (I'm still fighting myself)
The ones we love are so far away (My enemy is in me)

We are standing on the edge again
Right before our eyes we'll (fall down)
This life we had is a mess again
You say it's over, we're asking when?

My head is ringing like a bell
Stuck inside of a prison cell
The circles we ran, and miles lost
We want back at any cost

What's behind the door's isn't the worst
I guess we are just the cursed
Spending too much time on what if's
While ignoring what can be, what can be

I'm still hoping for better days (I'm still fighting myself)
The ones we love are so far away (My enemy is in me)

We are standing on the edge again
Right before our eyes we'll (fall down)
This life we had is a mess again
You say it's over, we're asking when?

We are standing on the edge again
Right before our eyes we'll (fall down)
This life we had is a mess again
You say it's over, we're asking when?

We are standing on the edge again
Right before our eyes we'll (fall down)
This life we had is a mess again
You say it's over, we're asking when?

5. "Exit Strategy"

She said, "I don't know,"
As the ground crumbled in her hand
I think we should turn away

Think back to the better days gone by
All alone we'll sit and wonder why
After these failed attempts to fly
We'll never try, we'll only die

The cold rain will fall again
We now have become a then
Still trying to live out a lie
The one's you can't deny, the ones you can't deny

We can't turn and walk away
This is now disarray
I'll be the one to find
The one you left behind, the one you left behind

All these doors have been slammed shut
An exit not is a lost cause
Looks like we're forced to stay

Like a wall, that you can't break through
This torn heart flutters like a torn page
The wind just won't carry me away
Coming of age, end of a phase

The cold rain will fall again
We now have become a then
Still trying to live out a lie
The one's you can't deny, the ones you can't deny

We can't turn and walk away
This is now disarray
I'll be the one to find
The one you left behind, the one you left behind

Our time has gone to waste
Leaving us without a taste
You reside in my memory
With no way out with no way out

The cold rain will fall again
We now have become a then
Still trying to live out a lie
The one's you can't deny, the ones you can't deny

We can't turn and walk away
This is now disarray
I'll be the one to find
The one you left behind, the one you left behind

6. "Down, But Not Out"

Are we the ones so far away, like a ship drifting out to sea?
Our destination has become unknown, somewhere we can’t agree
The curtains draw, and the lights go out, and we cannot flea
I don’t know where you stand anymore, but it’s just you and me

I know you're still standing alone
But this fuse has already blown

(We are) down but not out
Even though we stand against the odds
Break out, and see what it’s all about
Take a breath and jump into the unknown
(We are) down but not out
You can’t keep us from coming back (hey!)
Break out, and leave no sense of doubt
Take a breath and to the unknown

The road we take has brought us here, nowhere to be found
All these dreams that your tears have long since drowned
Are hiding somewhere in the past, as we turn ourselves around
Like a book with unwritten pages, we can find our common ground

I know you're still standing alone
But this fuse has already blown

(We are) down but not out
Even though we stand against the odds
Break out, and see what it’s all about
Take a breath and jump into the unknown
(We are) down but not out
You can’t keep us from coming back (hey!)
Break out, and leave no sense of doubt
Take a breath and jump into the unknown

(Solo)

(We are) down but not out
Even though we stand against the odds
Break out, and see what it’s all about
Take a breath and jump into the unknown
(We are) down but not out
You can’t keep us from coming back (hey!)
Break out, and leave no sense of doubt
Take a breath and jump into the unknown

Whoa-oh, whoa-oh-oh whoa-oh,
Whoa-oh, whoa-oh-oh whoa-oh,

7. Don't Take Our Voice"

We put to shame all the nay-sayers

Like a door that's been slammed shut in your face

We will not be silenced in this place

They told us to say all our prayers

We only got questions in return

They sit back and watch us fucking burn

I'm not the one to sit back and run away

The bridge's burnt, and there's no where to say

There's nothing left, don't take our voice

We'll play along but never by the rules

They're still trying to pass us off as fool

There's nothing left, don't take our voice

They draw the line just to cross again

Fourteen stand out against the grain

The be the ones left out in the rain

It's the words they won't condemn

When hate has become the norm

We're ignoring the oncoming storm

I'm not the one to sit back and run away

The bridge's burnt, and there's no where to say

There's nothing left, don't take our voice

We'll play along but never by the rules

They're still trying to pass us off as fool

There's nothing left, don't take our voice

Face to face, and eye to eye

Face to face, and eye to eye

I'm not the one to sit back and run away

The bridge's burnt, and there's no where to say

There's nothing left, don't take our voice

We'll play along but never by the rules

They're still trying to pass us off as fool

There's nothing left, don't take our voice

8. "Last Fight"

I know what you’re still thinking
The undertoe has dragged you back in
They brought you to the top
And dropped you like a brick
An awkward silence is all you have left

Another way (Another way)
To be let down (To be let down)
This is the last time, you fight alone

Break through the day (Break through the day)
Just to let go (Just to let go)
Someone tell me I’m okay

This time we live, for what’s ahead
We break out singing (whoa oh-oh, Whoa-oh-oh)
We throw our hands into the flame
You're not the only voice (Whoa oh-oh, Whoa oh-oh

Your scream pierces the cold of night
Still wishing on every star in that sky
You fell to your knees
With the promises you can’t keep
You hit to the ground like the fall leaves

Another way (Another way)
To be let down (To be let down)
You see yourself shatter like glass

Break through the day (Break through the day)
Just to let go (Just to let go)
May the bridges I burn light your way home

This time we live, for what’s ahead
We break out singing (whoa oh-oh, Whoa-oh-oh)
We throw our hands into the flame
You're not the only voice (Whoa oh-oh, Whoa oh-oh)

This time we live, for what’s ahead
We break out singing (whoa oh-oh, Whoa-oh-oh)
We throw our hands into the flame
You're not the only voice (Whoa oh-oh, Whoa oh-oh)

9. "Streetlights"

We don’t know what they’re saying

These voices once so loud have gone

It’s like a song that just keeps playing

The broken message just goes on

I’ve heard this all before

“No need to disobey”

(Whoa--)

We stand back, and watch it burn down

(Whoa--)

Our hearts ignite, under the streetlights

To picket lines, and questions unanswered

To the deserts to follow in the lies

I don’t think they get it

Everywhere let our fists fly to the skies

All it takes is one to speak out

Their dominos will cave in

(Whoa--)

We stand back, and watch it burn down

(Whoa--)

Our hearts ignite, under the streetlights

We aren’t the chosen, even if we try

We won’t wait for another day

(We have enough now)

I’ve heard this all before

“No need to disobey”

(Whoa--)

We stand back, and watch it burn down

(Whoa--)

Our hearts ignite, under the streetlights

(Whoa--)

We stand back, and watch it burn down

(Whoa--)

Our hearts ignite, under the streetlights

These voices once so loud have gone

10. "Only We Know"

There's a time, that I always run to

The lights on, but no one's home

It's a string we always undo

But this time, it's coming back on you

And so, we'll stand together

With these dreams we never had

But are we still breathing?

And though this road we take's to no where

And it may never end

But it's somewhere only we know

It's just a hand, I'm offering to you

You turn your back, and run away

We've seen out best, and worst

You feel the flame, but never stay

And so, we'll stand together

With these dreams we never had

But are we still breathing?

And though this road we take's to no where

And it may never end

But it's somewhere only we know

It's safe to come out of hiding

Under the veil of night we're confiding

We've lost the fight, but not the war

We're still hungry and coming back for more

And so, we'll stand together

With these dreams we never had

But are we still breathing?

And though this road we take's to no where

And it may never end

But it's somewhere only we know

And so, we'll stand together

On these dreams built on sand

But we still breathing

And though this road we take's to no where

But we are on the mend

But it's somewhere only we know

11. "All Or Nothing"

“All Or Nothing”

The words we swallow, always hurt the worse

They leave us empty and never quench our thirst

But it’s the breath that we choke on,

They stood and watched, as we’ve come and gone

I’ve stood back and let this go on too long

We’ll change the beat, yeah we’ll change the fucking song

We’ll find our place, under the sun again

We’ll lose it all, but it’s all we have

We’ll wipe the sweat as it drips from our brow

We’ll lose it all, but it’s all or nothing

The silence is shattered in this empty room

With words that my mind can’t consume

We’ve tried our best, but for what?

This slate is clean, like a blank page

I can’t look back, and waste time on the past

Years have been wasted, and the future’s coming fast

We’ll find our place, under the sun again

We’ll lose it all, but it’s all we have

We’ll wipe the sweat as it drips from our brow

We’ll lose it all, but it’s all or nothing

We’ll find our place, under the sun again

We’ll lose it all, but it’s all we have

We’ll wipe the sweat as it drips from our brow

We’ll lose it all, but it’s all or nothing

There we go. All 11 original tracks, not including the acoustic song. I just want to say this. If you are going to "re-use" my stuff, I will fucking take it back and re-tool it in the genre that it should have been in in the first place. Be more creative. Here are 11 entirely new tracks except for one chorus. What have you done. David, Wes, here be the lyrics you asked for.

I will start writing back in here in the next few days. I have a whole lot of things to say.