Good Bye Phoenix

It only has been delayed for a few months, but two years in the making, and strangely, I did it.

For me, Phoenix City is going to be in my rear view in a few months, and I couldn't be happier. I finally got accepted into NAU, so now comes a summer of taking a deep breath, and relaxing. Things are about the change rather rapidly.

That's all I have.

My Ears Are Open

Its is something so subtle that it goes unnoticed. Sometimes you can feel it like jerk from an earthquake, but most of the time the alterations in your personality are so discrete, you don't realize it until you see the past again. When I heard the voices from the past sing to me, I was appalled. My present me would have taken the me then aside and said this, "dude, change your direction now, or you are going to spin out." I would have probably been ignorant to that advice and continued to trudge on in a winless fight. Now I see what a mistake I have made years later.

This feeling is almost of being indifferent, and the fact that it is in the past, I couldn't be happier. I wish I could reclaim those three years of my life wasted, and transplant myself now into my old self shoes. Strangely, a lot of beliefs I had then did transfer over, although not you might think. When you are in a wanna be 80's band, and you can put any of your true feelings in it, you should have walked then. Only one song ever had like... correction, two songs had a "true" feeling in it. Now that I have been released from those chains almost a year I am able to voice what I want to, and say what I want to. No more restrictions, no more being tied to a lie.

It feels good.

The only we learn is from making mistakes along the road that we are taking. It is almost instinctual for us to do it that way. This statement I have made about a million times, "those who don't learn from their mistakes, are doomed to repeat them," I advise everyone to look at their flaws before saying, "this is what they want." Our flaws make us perfect. To be imperfect is what makes the human so perfect. There is no other way, and it is what is so intriguing.

Now here is what I will say for those that have read, and will read this will probably be the most reassuring part I have written in a while.

It is okay to be insecure, and scared about being out done by someone. It happens, there is always someone better than you out there. To say that you are the best is a lie. I mean it is so rare to find someone who would be called the best. There are exceptions, but so rare, so rare. I being a singer, artist, and writer know there is always someone that is better than me. I try not to worry about it, and just try to give it my all, and hope that what I leave on the table people will like, and if they don't accept what I give, their loss, not mine. This problem is one that so many have. We are never sure of ourselves, and it is what tends to hold us back. If we just give in to the notion that someone is better, instead of making it a competition we can relax, and get better at what we are trying to do.

Then I know there are the unmotivated. For you, find something you are passionate in, or something that erks you. For me I have politics, and on many occasions I will speak out about what is going on in the globe. I could speak about what is going on in Missouri, and Oklahoma, but I do not know enough about the situation to feel a true empathetic feeling for them. I feel bad, but I do not feel as bad as if I was effected by it. As to are most Americans, the "it doesn't hurt me so why care." I hope the people get help, I do, but I can't do anything. Those sitting around and wasting their life, why? Life is something so precious, and so short live it.

On that subject, a sudden moment of reality I had last night.

I asked a while ago, why do I keep visualizing myself dying in any situation that I get myself into. Whether it is a car accident, or a freak of nature, I always picture myself dying. Someone responded to me and said that I am probably really depressed, and need help. That is not the case. I am not a suicidal person, and would never want to do it. Now I know some of you are waiting for me to admit to that after reading the first part, not the case. I saw what someone said on a thread where some was admitting they wanted to kill themselves. Here is a paraphraised version of what they said, "you only get once chance at life, and if you want to kill your self you aren't living or doing enough." Then it dawned on me, these thoughts are of fear, not of depression. I am an ambitious individual, and there is so much out there that I want to do, and I have not had the chance to step up to the plate and take a swing. I am just scared of missing out. That is what my death visions are coming from. In other words, I want to live, and I don't want to miss a beat. Makes sense right? Weird, I know, but it is logical.

Anyways, that I believe is my ramblings for now. I will have more as the summer progresses. There will be a lot of down time. I think I will have a lot to say. Stay tuned...

Told You So

Well the prediction I made all of a day ago, it came true. It wasn't quite how I predicted it, but nonetheless, just as funny.

When I smell a problem, I can laugh at it. Karma has a weird way of playing its self out.

Let me just say this since I now have some peoples attention. Life right now for me, even though I hate sounding selfish, is going really good. I have a great girlfriend, and things for the most part are falling into place. This summer is shaping up to be a very good summer from the start, atlthough not a fast one, but a good one so far. There is a lot that is going to happen this summer that has me excited. The crazy part is I am probably on route to move out within the next three months, finally relocate to Flagstaff. I am concerned about it, the change is good, but there things I am leaving behind I am not sure I want to leave here. I am a two hour drive away, I need to remember that.

Things happening this summer

1. Show Sunday at the Clubhouse

2. California for the 4th of July and Against Me!

3. Recording

4. First headlining show July 23

5. Against Me! again in Phoenix in August

6. Moving.

Those are just the headlines. There is much more that is going to happen. What I don't know. I am debating myself if I want to seek a summer job, or just take it easy. Honestly, I don't feel like sitting around home all week. Although, my fat ass is doing the P90X work out, which I believe I have already lost like 4 or 5 pounds, I just need to eat better. It's a choice I'll make soon. I don't think 500 bucks will last me the summer, so a job would be nice.

I would bitch about this "rapture" thing that is supposed to happen in about 14 hours, but I don't see the need. You've seen my religions stance. I really don't care, and this it is just nuts. I had an interesting conversation today about it. The only answer that we really can't answer is, energy never dies. So there has to be something after death. Is conscious an energy, or is nothing. Crazy thoughts!

Damn, I wish I had more reasons to be pissed off, or some really interesting things to say right now. I don't so I hate to be the buzz kill. I've said this before, when I'm not under a lot of stress I don't write, when I'm not bored I don't write. Right now I write because I am bored. So suck on that for now. later.-SP

Victory Lap

We'll my seven day stress is now over. I know things all should fall into place. This fall will be very interesting to say the least! My nerves are going to be excited, but really scared about this change. It is going to more than welcomed. So here we go, a summer where I will be taking a victory lap because of this achievement!

Any whooo.

While I am here, I have things to talk about, of course. Mostly music, after all I just did talk personal before, so lets go to what tends to be the norm here.

I'll just say these things straight forward, because I know it pisses them off. I got all the dirt on my old band through a very reliable source, it is amazing what people will say when they are talking to a girl. What I learned was rather funny, and sad. For the most part they are a shit talking band, everyone talks shit behind each others back, which comes as no surprise to me, it was happening before, I guess things never change. They also have mad communication problems, they were trying to tell one member to come to practice while they were on vacation, and they were told this by him many a times. Being in a band requires communication, and if they are having this problem, it will only get worse. The shit talking will become a problem to, especially when one member is intimidated by the others talent, and feels that they were encroaching on their side of the stage during show.

Oh, and lets get to the music.

I learned that they aren't writing anything new. I saw them two months ago, and all the music was stuff that was written back from 2009-2010, apparently they have to sink even lower to steal music that wasn't even written by them, to stuff that was written back in 2008, when only one member was in the band, and that member has no real creative input behind it. Kind of low, right? It's okay, I have MP3's of all the songs they are trying to rip off. It just shows that they are uncreative pukes, trying to rehash old stuff that didn't work in the first place, and what makes them think it will work again. I mean, they lyrics to the original versions of the songs actually meant something, they weren't written just to write meaningless lyrics. The last song I posted, "All Or Nothing," was actually inspired by my girlfriend. Writing a song about a girl doesn't always have to be a love ballad, or sex song, contrary to popular belief. It also can be taken in many different directions. From what I heard their lyrics are whiny, and bland. Hey if that's how they think they are going to make it, rehashing things that didn't work in the first place, go for it. Also, playing the same venue every show will not help.

My band currently has 11 completed original songs (all entirely new), we all get along very well, and our live show has been great now. We practice about 4-6 times a week, and actually went a 10 straight day run recently, and didn't even notice it. Being constant, and making the songs muscle memory are key to the band. We already have had people come up to us, and find meanings in our songs we didn't even know were there, so I guess we can say we are doing something right.

That's it for now. I sleep. Oh, I sleep.-SP

Post Script: Now I am finding out that one member is planning on leaving, and they probably have no clue. As me being a journalist, I have a more than reliable source. My theory is just more right. Creepy. I'm good at predicting things.

All Or Nothing

“All Or Nothing”

The words we swallow, always hurt the worse

They leave us empty and never quench our thirst

But it’s the breath that we choke on,

They stood and watched, as we’ve come and gone

I’ve stood back and let this go on too long

We’ll change the beat, yeah we’ll change the fucking song

We’ll find our place, under the sun again

We’ll lose it all, but it’s all we have

We’ll wipe the sweat as it drips from our brow

We’ll lose it all, but it’s all or nothing

The silence is shattered in this empty room

With words that my mind can’t consume

We’ve tried our best, but for what?

This slate is clean, like a blank page

I can’t look back, and waste time on the past

Years have been wasted, and the future’s coming fast

We’ll find our place, under the sun again

We’ll lose it all, but it’s all we have

We’ll wipe the sweat as it drips from our brow

We’ll lose it all, but it’s all or nothing

(We rise, we fall)

(We lose it all)

(To stand, again)

(Just to find our zen)

We’ll find our place, under the sun again

We’ll lose it all, but it’s all we have

We’ll wipe the sweat as it drips from our brow

We’ll lose it all, but it’s all or nothing

Band Dilemma

Well. I hate to get your hopes up, but this isn't a problem where the next step is the band falls apart. No not even close. Just sucky scheduling might suck.

Here's the low down...

Authority Zero is playing Club Red July 2, and we have been asked to play. Here is the catch. Most of us have planned vacations already which we would all be back in town together on July 10. My vacation plans are taking me to Pomona, CA for Warped Tour to see Against Me!, Street Dogs, and Continental, and of course mass beach time. Kurtis will be in the San Jose area to be with family, and Anthony will be in San Diego with his father.

It's not the end of the world if we can't do it, but the exposure we could garner would be tremendous! AZ plays there all the time, but it is just the first chance we saw. We are also working with the guy at Club Red about doing a festival soon, and possibly getting Strike Anywhere, and Nations Afire to do it, but all right now is just ideas, and waiting to work things out.

We'll see how this goes. Fuck you bad timing!!!

Political System Theory

Political system

A democratic socialist system based off of Marxism, and current American democracy. All people are created equal, but some are higher on a “food chain.”

Public services, like firefighter, police, teachers and healthcare workers, true minimum wage/entry jobs are at the bottom, broken into three classes, Class A, which receives better portioned rations/pay, Class B, which shall receive less than A, but make more than C, and C which makes the lowest, but more than enough to live comfortably. You can go up and down in the pay class.

To fix modern political system, an uprising anarchistic like state must happen to over throw current government. Modern government is broken, and must be fixed. In this government system it is very similar to modern US political system; there is a bi-cameral house and senate, and a supreme court. The president is voted on by the people, there are no parties, just people. Presidential elections are held every four years, and president can be voted in an infinite amount of times. If the president is voted out by the people, a majority vote, ie 51%-49%, he serves a fifth year, and then at the end of that year, an election is held between two new candidates that are picked randomly from a computer. The out going president can be picked again if their name comes up. The government helps prepare the two random citizens for an election. The selected can decline, and another drawing is held to find another candidate. The house and senate is held just like modern senate and house, a citizen will announce candidacy and will run that way. House and senate members cannot be selected for president; they can, however, run if they step down from their political position. They lose their seat, and cannot get it back until the next election cycle, and can regain a seat.

There is no official religion or shall there ever be. All religions shall be tolerate.

English is the official language, although other languages can be spoken and taught.

Metric system is the official system of measure.

I Am Complete

To those who never had a chance...

Let tell you a jig about song writing. Not a jig, because well I am not going to dance for you. I just completed writing the tenth song for my bands album. Yes, we have a records worth of songs, and yes it is going to be recorded this summer. I know only a select few people actually read this so I figured I'd spill the beans here before we do May 22 at the Clubhouse. Riot Act will be going into studio July 20 to record a ten (10) track record. The cost, not as bad as you would think, we'll leave that out. Recorded by who, someone who saw us in show and is a big Rise Against fan and has a $100,000 plus recording studio that he is going to let us use. networking rocks. Also doing a cover of "Give it All" can turn heads if you do it right.

Anywhoo...

I just finished writing the lyrics for the last song. Here are the lyrics:

"Streetlights"

We don’t know what they’re saying

These voices once so loud have gone

It’s like a song that just keeps playing

The broken message just goes on

I’ve heard this all before

“No need to disobey”

(Whoa--)

We stand back, and watch it burn down

(Whoa--)

Our hearts ignite, under the streetlights

To picket lines, and questions unanswered

To the deserts to follow in the lies

I don’t think they get it

Everywhere let our fists fly to the skies

All it takes is one to speak out

Their dominos will cave in

(Whoa--)

We stand back, and watch it burn down

(Whoa--)

Our hearts ignite, under the streetlights

We aren’t the chosen, even if we try

We won’t wait for another day

(We have enough now)

I’ve heard this all before

“No need to disobey”

(Whoa--)

We stand back, and watch it burn down

(Whoa--)

Our hearts ignite, under the streetlights

(Whoa--)

We stand back, and watch it burn down

(Whoa--)

Our hearts ignite, under the streetlights

These voices once so loud have gone

Now some people think writing ten songs is tough, not really. Think this. If you look at the insert of most bands records they say "songs written between (as an example) June-October 2007." Most albums are written between 3-4 months, and we are doing just 10 tracks, now mind you this we practice around 16 hours a week, on writing weeks we may practice 20 hours a week. Now pro bands will be in studio to write for maybe 40-60 hours a week, mind you we are all students, and not a pro band. So that takes away from that. I find writing lyrics very easy. I learned recently how to more so freestyle write, and as we put it "frickashawna," or basically making weird noises over the instrumental and picking words out of it. Actually, the chorus lines "We stand back, and watch it burn down/Our hearts ignite...." actually came while I was just basically singing gibberish, I wanted to say those words. Same thing with our last song we wrote "Exit Strategy." They come very easy. The instrumentals take about two hours two write sometimes, that is even on a higher side, most of the time the music, or part of is written away from practice. Then we record the instrumental, now with me singing a melody, and I listen to it and write lyrics. Not that hard.

Composing music too isn't that hard. If you are making it hard on yourself, you are doing something wring. Tom Gabel does it best. He'll string three chords together, and make it sound great. It is really that simple. People will say that takes originality out of it, not really. It is also about what is said. To write weird lyrics that don't make any sense, or self centered lyrics are not really that exciting. Give a listener something that they can picture themselves doing. The song that is above is about the rage, passion and emotion of protest against what is keeping you down. It can also be taken other ways if you want too. I'm not saying my songs have to have one meaning. I also like ironic songs. I have one song that is probably going to be the second single that's title is the opposite about what it is about. Then another track, which I believe I have posted here On Edge has about three or four meanings. Look at it politically, or emotionally, and you will find something there. That is what this band that I am in is about. Getting through to the listener to let them know that they are not the only one who's life has been fucked up or screwed over. Most band now a days really do forget the listener. I won't let that happen anymore.

To sum it up. Song writing is easy, adn don't over complicate it. Goodnight.-SP